Dossier, Volume 14 #2: A Spiritual Sampler

Entrance Way to the Church's Treasure

If there was such a thing as a typical Charismatic prayer group newcomer, Mary was that. She came to her first prayer meeting with that "typical" look of anticipation, mellowed by fear. She had heard that people here sang songs, raised their hands in praise, prayed in tongues and believed that God worked in their daily lives. She seesawed between good Catholic skepticism of these outward manifestations and a curious desire to see for herself what this was about.

After attending several prayer meetings, she reflected on the inexplicable sense of joy and peace that she was experiencing in her everyday life: humming songs of worship as she worked, even reading her Bible. The words seemed to speak directly to her and carry a great feast for reflection. She loved the leaders, the music ministry, the glorious sunshine, the pristine snow, the little brown sparrows. Every living thing was teaching her of her creator. Mary had entered her first spiritual consolation--she knew that God loved her, that Jesus died for her, that the Holy Spirit was leading her into a personal relationship with God. And she saw that it was good.

For Mary, as for many people, the Charismatic Renewal provided an entrance way to a new and personal relationship with God. People felt invited to this banquet of love, surprised that ordinary people like themselves could be called to enter into the experience of God. The Charismatic Renewal unlocked a whole new spiritual experience for many people and prayer groups began to spring up in many places around the world.

While Charismatic prayer groups seemed to mold in response to differing local situations and needs, they all were characterized by some common elements. The main one was, and still is, the Baptism of the Holy Spirit. This baptism is not a sacrament but a simple ceremony in which a person freely renews their baptismal commitment, freely accepts Christ as their God and Saviour, and in the name of Jesus invites the Holy Spirit to renew in them the graces and gifts received at Baptism and Confirmation. St. Paul describes these gifts in 1 Corinthians 12-13: the gifts of faith, healing, prophecy, discernment of spirits, praise, gift of tongues, knowledge and the excellence of Love. In some cases, perhaps too much focus was placed on the gifts of the Spirit rather than the Giver of the gifts, and on the "power" of the Spirit rather than the poverty of Spirit required for growth in this relationship with God. But there is no denying that the Charismatic Renewal provided an experience of God's loving and caring presence in people's lives.

Prayer groups flourished in the 1970s. In fact, by 1975 the Directory of Catholic Charismatic Prayer Groups listed more than 3,800 groups in fifty-four countries (more than half in the United States. People flocked to Charismatic conferences around the world, hungry to be nourished at the table of God. Weekend retreats for Charismatics had long waiting lists. The enthusiasm and commitment to things of the Spirit seemed insatiable.

Today, while the numbers of people attending prayer groups have decreased, many groups continue to exist across North America and continue to fulfil a role in leading people to an experience of God.

The Charismatic Renewal was highly successful in fulfilling an evangelical purpose, but people who sought to journey further along the path of spiritual life found that the way was not always clear and in fact was often painful. After some time in the renewal, the initial consolations were replaced with real experiences of desolation, aridity in prayer, darkness and a silent God. At this point, it became obvious that some people were not willing to endure the pain of spiritual growth and desolation. A common refrain heard from these reluctant souls might be, "I must be praying wrong" or "God doesn't love me any more." It was as though God was simply a vending machine dispensing whatever we wanted, if only we could figure out which button to push.

Nonetheless, many courageous people, wounded by the love they had experienced from God and for God, decided to walk the more narrow path. They recognized that they were called to move out of the comfortable and pleasant welcome centre, the vestibule, to choose the God of consolation, even if that entailed a dark and arduous process. This meant letting go of all those preconceived notions of what God ought to be or do, walking in that mapless land of faith, trusting that the Holy Spirit would guide and lead.

In the early days of the renewal, help for Charismatic Catholics often came from the traditions of Protestant Evangelicals, who provided some interpretation and teaching for the gifts associated with the Baptism in the Spirit. However, this tradition was of limited help to those who sought to grow deeper in relationship with God. Instead, trusting in the authenticity of their initial experience, many began to search further into the Catholic tradition, and it was here they began to discover (or rediscover) a rich treasure, easily overlooked and often taken for granted: the mystical tradition of the church.

Many clergy were willing to offer their guidance and resources to these floundering charismatics who were searching for help. These nuns and priests and some spiritually mature laypeople proved to be a wonderful support for those who genuinely sought the God of all goodness. And great mystics like St. John of the Cross, St. Ignatius of Loyola, St. Teresa of Avila and Thomas à Kempis patiently waited on bookshelves to offer their great gift to anyone willing to walk the difficult path to purification of heart.

People discovered that there were indeed many rooms in the house of God, that the Charismatic Renewal was merely an entrance, a genuine meeting place with Jesus. Just as in the Gospel people came to meet Jesus in many and varied ways, so even today Jesus meets individuals in many different but authentic situations. The danger comes when the meeting place is identified as the final destination, because it limits the depth and heart of God and removes the focus of authentic spirituality.

Today, Mary and many like her no longer attend prayer meetings on a regular basis. Others have followed in their place. But many like Mary continue to serve in a variety of ministries from soup kitchens to children's liturgies, or just simply walk humbly with their God, trying their best to act justly and love tenderly. And they continue on this journey never forgetting the decisive turn their lives took the night they wandered into that parish hall for their first prayer meeting.

Kathy Curtin lives in Cambridge, Ontario, with her husband and family. She works as a teacher in educational programming for senior citizens.